Six behaviors to increase your confidence


when i was in high school my mom asked me to order a pizza for the family on a friday night i looked up the phone number in the phone book and promptly handed the phone to my older brother to place the call i was too shy to talk to a stranger fast forward to college at the university of il

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 when i looked around at the confident students walking around me around campus heads held high pursuing a dream that they had set out to achieve i wanted that kind of confidence too but my behaviors did not align with these confident attitudes crying in my dorm room shying away from social engagement not showing up for class because i was worried others were smarter than me these were not going to lead me to achieve my goal so i knew is that i needed to change research tells us that in order to get people to change you need to not start with the attitudes but with the behaviors associated with those attitudes when people can see themselves behaving differently they get then begin to act differently so the questions for me were who am i who do i want to become and how does this person i want to become behave the answers were that i wanted a successful career one that meant something allowed me to contribute and for me that was defined as a career as a sports executive in order to achieve this goal i needed to begin to act more confidently.

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 and i did because 13 years later i became the first female general manager of a triple a baseball team in nearly 20 years thank you i also went on to host the leadership is female podcast where i've interviewed over 90 female executives in sports an industry that's over 80 percent male at management level and above and time after time these women have told me that the number one skill they've improved in order to earn their spot at the top of the sports industry is confidence they like me did not possess this confidence necessary to increase their level in their career from the get-go they had to work on the behaviors associated with this attitude in order to propel their career forward so i'm here today to share with you six behaviors you can start today to increase your confidence why is it important to increase our confidence.

 well think of this how would you behave or what could you achieve if you were 10 times more confident number one count yourself in i spoke with a woman about her first time doing sideline reporting at a nationally televised basketball game she was shaking in her heels standing courtside nerves overtaking her until she heard something familiar in her headset we'll be on in five and three two one you're live and she performed with excellence the nerves melting away she's an athlete a former basketball player used to performing on the court by the clock and the tactic remain true counting will get you started and momentum will keep you going i have used this technique i've had more uncomfortable conversations than i care to recall but one i'll share with you today i vividly remember standing on the warning track of the baseball field 45 minutes before game time looking at the opposing manager and his team wearing the wrong color uniform i wanted to turn and run back up to my office and hide but instead i faced him head on and i said in my mind three two one go and i started walking towards him and when i arrived we had a very uncomfortable conversation about his team wearing the wrong color uniform yes i had asked these grown men to change their clothes it was so awkward but when i asked myself who am i and how do i behave the answer was that i'm a person who's not too shy to to stand up for what i believe what is right and stand up to conflict counting got me started and momentum kept me going number two what if you only had to be brave for a total of 20 seconds give yourself 20 seconds of courage this behavior helped me enormously when i published my podcast leadership is female bold title and all for all the world to see hear critique and have their opinions .

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